檢視較大的地圖 Ins't it a beautiful view? Everytime I miss my home in the States, I just Google Street View; I'd imagine myself walking on the same routes that I walk Shadow, I'd proudly show my co-workers where I used to live, and they'd look at the screen with awe, well maybe just curiosity, anyway, technology is just...amazing.
It makes me think about where I want to spend the rest of my life...well I haven't been to many places yet, but I've gotta say I love the Bay Area the most thus far.
So I was reading articles about buying homes versus renting homes.
It was quite interesting because according tot he calculator that I used:
I'm going to have to pay over $6,000 monthly of mortgage for the next 30 years of my life. And that's if I pay 10% down payment, which would be $100k.
This calculation is based on average home prices in Foster City, with around $1 million for a standard single family house (3 bed, 2.5 baths, at around 2-2.5K square feet.)
I've never really did the calculation on owning a home in a place where I'd like to live; but $6,000 monthly payment for 30 years (when I turn 60?) for a mediocre house is pretty difficult and depressing.
Well fortunately (and shameless) enough for me, I can still live and chew off my parents by living in my parents house for a good couple of years, and some may say "Nah Jacky you're gonna get it all!" ...slow down. We've got 5 kids in the family! Better be safe than sorry right?
Well right now I merely make about $1.2K a month, as much as I would like to increase my income, it is safe to say that it will probably stay low for the next 1-2 year before I can make a break. But I've always wanted to buy my own house.
I mean I will probably get help from my dad but deep down inside, I really, really want to do it on my own, maybe it's because my whole life everything is provided for, then sort of taken away by outsiders (my step family) and that I never had solid control or opinion about the property I live in.
And since everything was provided for, my opinion never really mattered and I have never been responsible for many things; well it's time to make a difference, it's time to step up and become a man, sooner or later, I'm going to need to figure this whole thing out, I'm going to settle down some day...and I need to be happy with myself for whatever decision I make for the rest of my life.
Seriously, I don't think I will ever feel truly happy if I can never obtain my own house, it's going to haunt me for the rest of my life, that I'm very sure. Because that would mean I'm have not accomplished a tiny fracture that my father had accomplish, and he started from NOTHING and I have a head start with his help! Damn why am I being emo all of a sudden, this post was supposed to be about how broke I am and how I am going to ever afford buying a house.
So I have finally come to accepting the fact that I lost the biggest sale I've made. But before I put this case to rest, I'd like to express one more time how I feel about this whole thing. How do I describe this feeling? Since I just watched Slumdog Millionaire...It's like...you're on the million-dollar question in Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? and while you are very certain of the final answer, just before you say "YES!" to "Is that your final answer?", Chuck Norris comes in, roundhouse kicks you out of your chair and destroys the Universe.
Sorry for the shitty analogy but that's the best I got.
This post is once again dedicated to the beloved government authorities of Taiwan, who roundhouse kicked me and destroys my Universe. Before I move on to remorse I'd like to say that the Taiwanese government are not capable of problem solving and are certainly best at being a bunch of hypocritical, bureaucratic, systematic, idiotic fuck-heads who do all that they can to avoid troubles.
They claim that they care about the food safety of the Taiwanese people, yet everyday in the paper you see babies being poisoned from milk powders from China. Their so-called world-standard food safety regulations is a pathetic attempt of "Trying to sound cool!" from a bunch of unprofessional, inexperienced posers who know the least bit about food safety.
The president MA (as in My Ass) is a little egotistic, power hungry pretty boy who claims and does all his efforts to stimulate the Taiwanese economy, yet at the same time placing three legal barriers to exporting RAW HONEY - one of the most common commodity item to be traded world-wide, HONEY, not drugs, not vaccines, not chemical compounds, HONEY. These three barriers include and I will never forget their long and meaningless names:
Bureau of Animal and Plant Health Inspection and Quarantine - A government authority that is specilized in examining whether imported/exported goods are safe, well they obviously don't know what the fuck they're doing because they don't know how to examine honey.
The Ministry of Health Taiwan - A government authority that is specilized in the legal regulations of traditional and pharmaceutical products and services, they don't know what the fuck they're doing with honey, which is NOT traditional medicine NOR pharmaceutical products.
Agriculture and Food Agency Council of Agriculture Taiwan - A government authority that is specialized in the agricultural development of Taiwan, they too, don't know what the fuck they've got to do with exporting honey to other countries, "Shouldn't that be the Health Inspection Bureau's business?" They say.
Honestly I am not over this shit storm yet, the more I think about it the more I feel frustrated. It's just not right.
However, I should not blame this whole thing to other people, because they are what they are, incompetent pigs sucking at their jobs. I can't OINK OINK to pigs thinking I can communicate with them, the OINKs wouldn't make sense for me OR the pigs, I'd have to observe the pigs, find out what they like and what they don't like and work them to do what they should be doing. THAT'S how you deal with pigs.
Another week gone, resetting my motivation meter back to 0. A brand new day tomorrow yes?
I'm going to play some Warcraft tonight, it's been a while, game on.
I was thinking about how I'm turning 27 this year, and it is quite scary to think about turning 27.
27? Twenty-Seven...? I mean the first thing that comes in mind with the age 27 for a guy my age (26) is usually "Damn that's old!", pardon my opinion to the elders but seriously, being 27 years old for my current mental state is relatively ANCIENT.
Well, realistically speaking, being 27 is actually still young with a lot of youth, opportunities and times to exploit, it's just that I am not exactly where I picture I'd be when I turn 27. For starters, I haven't gotten much saved. My dad married my mom when he was 27, and according to legends, my dad made his big $$$ break-through when he was 28, and lost all his money to an investment the same year, the year I was born.
I was listening to Eminem the other day, and as I tried to follow on with his rap on the song "Square Dance" from his third album The Eminem Show, he was saying "I'm twenty-eight, they gon' take you 'fore they take me! crazy insane or insane crazy.." And I was like, damn Em was 28 on his 3rd album?
So comparing to them, I have accomplished very little for a guy my age; I haven't gained a lot; I haven't lost a lot, I haven't experienced much in life. And one issue that is starting to (and always have) concern me is that I still don't have a girlfriend. And I have finally come to the conclusion - I am just not motivated enough.
For years I've been complaining about being single, as a matter of fact I hypnotize myself as not having enough time to go out and meet people. Hey, new news, you ALWAYS have time, as cliche as it sounds in most movies, YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE. The truth of the matter is, I choose to do something else over going out and increase the potential of meeting new people. Like, watching DVDs, sleeping, playing games, etc.
Besides having a girl though, my primary concern is whether I am READY or not. Have I done enough to be ready for what it comes in life? Am I ready to embrace the responsibility of being a good, supportive guy for a girl? And of course it's never too early to think about whether I am ready support a famil or not.
I believe that nobody is ever ready for these things, but am I prepared at least?
I don't know man, just questions start popping out and can't help but wondering what tools I have, what skillsets I have, what mentality I have to face what life is bringing to me.
Well it's been a rough week, I was the happiest kid on the planet last Saturday, and as each day passed starting this week, bad news wouldn't stop knocking on the door. Today, I'm just sad.
I am fully aware that there a many things in life that are out of our control, and that we should not be troubled or worried over problems that we can not solve; because if we could solve the problem, we should not have worried about it, and if we can't solve the problem, why worry over it?
I think about Tom Cruise as Vincent from Collateral:
"But hey, shit happens, so now we're onto plan B, you gotta adapt to the environment, improvise, Darwin, I-Ching, whatever man we gotta ROLL WITH IT."
You know this is probably the most cheering words for me, I guess right now I am in the 3rd or 4th stage of Grief -- Bargaining and Depression.
It's 1. Denial 2.Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression, and 5. Acceptance by the way.
This sucks because I was planning to do a celebratory post for my biggest sale, now I would like to dedicate the post to our dearest Taiwanese government officials who refused to approve my goods to be shipped to EU countries.
It is truly amazing that at such devastating time of ours, with unemployment sky-rocketing and economy on speed declines, our Taiwanese government still managed to stop businesses from happening.
And yes I understand they're just doing their jobs, and I am just doing mine, the difference is that I care about mine, and they don't. Ever had the DMV experience? Why care? Why work faster? Why help you? They work for the government, the very top concern on their mind is to not make any mistakes, and the very top concern for me is the result. And in order to solve my problem they're gonna have to step up and handle the problem, but since none of them want to make any mistakes, they step AWAY from the problem, and now I'm stuck.
They don't get promoted and they don't get laid off, the result? A bunch of incompetent, slow, unmotivated zombies with zero compassion.
God I get frustrated just thinking about them, I don't know, I just hope I can get some good news next Monday.
Makie Otonotachibanafrom Blade of the Immortal (Mugen no Juunin)
Rough Sketch, I was quite troubled with what she should wear, as you can see her body is quite messy with all them lines that I drew/erased. I mean it's Makie, with her God-like status in the series it's quite hard to figure out what Goddesses wear. Come to think of it, Goddesses, particularly those from Greek mythology, don't really wear anything. Oh well, Goddesses should look awesome whether they're naked or not, they should still look sexy even if they're in banana suits.
After hours of struggles, I decided to keep shit simple... that did not end up so simple.
Put her on some dress and high heels, couldn't think of any other types of clothings on her; but then it looked so boring so decided to throw her on some towel thing, which can be seen a lot in the manga series, makes her look a lot more elegant, but that piece of cloth also took me a long time to draw...
I like drawing hands, but this time the hands took me twice the time my Manji + Rin hands took.
5 little fingers, took the whole afternoon to get right, women's hands and fingers are much more delicate and elegant, which takes a great amount of patience to get the feel right.
This hand is a lot simpler; what bothers me more is the guitar, is it me or the guitar's got a big-ass head? Or maybe it's just a big-ass guitar? I don't know.
And here we go!
Made some small changes to her eyes so it matches the manga a little more; and decided afterall the guitar was too damn big so I made it smaller.
In the end I'm very happy with the result. No photoshop this time because too many lines and details, the guitar itself is already too much work on my wrist, not to mention my wrist on my lousy, semi-functional mouse.
Close up.
Next up: The fearless, ruthless, not-giving-a-fuck heavy metal/punk rock/hip hop band: The Itto-ryu Band...maybe.
By the way, much thanks to John Mayer, Linkin Park, Eminem, Maroon 5, and Jason Mraz for the BGM and some beers while drawing, makes drawing endlessly enjoyable!
Since I wanted to practice Photoshop for coloring and I have no water color equipment here, I've decided to give it a try. OH WHAT NAIVE IGNORANT FOOL I WAS!!!
I guess I am too inexperienced to start with, the following sequence along too me 1 hour. The first step to coloring is to transfer my drawing (with digital camera) into pure black/white lines for easier colorings. I had no idea it was going to be such a pain in the ass. So for future references here is how we do it:
1. On Microsoft Picture editor - enhance the contrast so that the lines will be clearer 2. Enhance Color to set the background as definitive white in the image.
3. On Photoshop: Discard all colors (on ONE layer only) then delete background using Magic Wand 4. On Enhance, use brightness/contrast and contrast all lines, the darker the better 5. On Enhance = Replace Colors, Replace gray colors and pull lightness to full, and eventually you'll get...
Yay~ NOW we start coloring...
Skin is usually the most important part and easiest to mess up with.
Choosing the right brush is important too; I think to each his own but since this is for base color I used pretty wide brush at around 80% Opacity.
Then onto the easy-to-color parts.
Had a hard time with the leather jacket and jeans though, can't really bring out the texture...so they look like some nylon jacket and pants.
Using smaller brushes and lighter opacity (around 60-70%), I now slowly detail the skin tones and hair.
Hair is another issue to work on because it's just hard to create the texture.
So for another couple of hours I sit there and stare at the screen, fixing this and that, it is actually the most fun part for the coloring though; it is the time when I usually lose track of time.
And here we go:
Voila Part 2!!
Yeah it still needs more work, but I'm gonna call it done... feels good though.
And how dare I put up artworks from the master? But the cover page for the newest episode (#175) of Blade of the Immortal (or Mugen no Jyuunin) is just so freaking sweet, especially when you know what happened that episode...
Well so as I expected the past weekend was just as uninspiring as any other weekend, why do I get so bored? I have similar conversation to many people, and it's been suggested by many that perhaps I should get back to drawing. I haven't drawn for more than 2 years, back in the day I used to look forward to free time so I can draw. But now it's just like ahh whatever laahhhh~!
Though I do get inspirations and motivations to draw here and there, I just never really picked up the pen(cil) and draw it down, but whatever, I'm putting my "haitus" to an end and decided to tribute my returning debut to my beloved Mugen no Jyuunin - Blade of the Immortal. YES, because the series just freaking kicks ass and Manji/Rin are my favorite manga characters of all time, and Samura Hiroaki the author is hardcore and his art simply OWNS!!!
By the way, according to how the story is going, I think the series is going to end in the next 2 volumes, although it has been going for 12 years (it's at Vol. 24 Japanese, Vol. 23 Chinese, and Vol. 21 English now).
I always wondered how Mangakas do their drawings; I loved seeing unfinished artworks and the process in which the manga is created, but I haven't seen many, so here I recorded my own:
Well I'm not a pro so I usually start out by drawing the eyes, then nose and all that, but experiences has shown that if you don't do a little planning ahead you usually will have unproportional results, like head too big or crooked limbs, uneven hands...etc. Manji's face. Decided to change his hair style although I loved the way it is in the manga, but then I wanted to put him on some modern clothes so there we go. Rin's face, I don't know why she's holding a candy, but I liked how it turned out. I had a hard time with that damn cowgirl hat, took me like 20 minutes to made it look like a hat. Then onto my favorite part, sketch out the body frame then add details. The smoking hand took me at least 30 minutes, and it STILL doesn't look right, douma. Decided to add a little Punk Rock on Manji, hopefully it turned out alright? And Voila! Manji + Rin in leather goods!
I'm also tired, think it took me 4+ hours to get here. And they're only the lines! Since I got no watercolor equipment here I'll probably do it on Photoshop later, or just use pencils all the way for the details and shades.
Slow, inefficient internet services should be considered a serious threat to the human health; I think I am really developing hypertension due to long waits for simple pages to load. I don’t understand why the internet is so slow here, it’s like living in the dial-up, AOL days. “You’ve got mail!”
Google took 2 to 3 seconds to load, which is actually the fastest. And Xanga? Took total of 15 minutes to load, which explains why I am writing this post on Microsoft Word, by the time it finishes it’s loading I have already written, reviewed, and re-written the whole freaking post.
Why at the age of 26 am I still emotionally unstable? (Actually, why not?) I don’t understand and I get pissed at myself for it. I’d let incontrollable things control my emotions. Take traffic for example, there is really nothing I can do about it, word to Drama: “My father used to tell me the best thing to do about traffics, is to NOT BEin one.”
I’m starting to think that maybe the only way to be happier is to be able to gain control on more things…and to do that I think one needs to have a lot of money, so it makes life easier and less of a pain in the ass to deal with.
I have never owned more than a G in my bank, always the one crying about how low the bank statement is yet continues to shop, hell, at several occasions I actually had to withdraw the last $7 from the bank teller, and they freaking charged 25 cents for it, which left me with 6 bucks and 3 quarters, sad Sad SAD! …but hey, that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate the power of money. I think money can make me happier, it won’t make me happy forever, but it will make me happier.
What makes a person happy forever anyway? Love? I don’t know, since I haven’t been in any intimate relationship for a long time, I am beginning to doubt that if true love exists at all.
Anyway, screw love, you know what? Money can’t buy love alright, but money will surely increase the percentage of love from occurring to you drastically higher. Sure with money you’ll get superficial women that lust after your money, but then again it can be considered a mutual beneficial relationship, I don’t want to go so far as to calling it a legalized prostitution, but it’s in the same ball park. And if the world isn’t as dark as I thought, you’d meet someone who actually appreciates who you are!
But with no money? You can’t do anything, you can’t take the girl out, you can’t go to the movies, have nice dinners, drink nice wines, shit, if you don’t have any money you probably won’t even get a car to take the girl anywhere at all. I mean that’s not necessarily bad, I WAS that guy, it sucked! All I’m saying is, without money your chances of meeting a true love is drastically lower because before you find out about love, you’re dumped.
Anyway back to my point. Money won’t make me happy forever, and neither will love (maybe a peaceful family? We’ll just have to wait and see.) One thing I know for sure is that money can buy me convenience, the more money you have, the more convenient your life will become, and when you are super loaded, all your conveniences in life sum up and become Freedom. You get to eat whatever the fuck you want, travel to wherever you want, whenever and however. You get to do things you truly enjoy when you have money, and as a matter of fact, it is through my understanding that when you do what you truly enjoy, chances are you are good at it, and when you’re good at something, you’d probably get paid more for it.
And as uncertain as Happiness seems to me, Freedom seems like a good substitute goal, at least it’s solid, and the map to the Freedom land is real simple, just make money.
Some people out there will beg to differ and raise the argument, saying that true freedom comes within oneself. YES I AGREE, but I’d rather find freedom with money than be free with my own-self, and chances are, those who think freedom can be obtained without money are probably as broke as, if not broker than I am.
So how does one make more money? Coming from Dr. Cheng who withdrew the last $7 from his bank, the very first freaking rule in making money is to SAVE MONEY. This is something I’ve realized and should have realized over 10 years ago. Ever since coming to Asia I go out less than usual and eat at home more, while getting paid less than half of what I used to get paid in the states, my savings grew 10 folds in one year, though it’s a hell of a lot far away from the conveniences I’ve described earlier, I find myself not contemplating about good meals and vacations as much, don’t get me wrong, all I’m saying is if you save, that is, if you eat out less, shop less, and spend less on your normal days, your room for budget for luxurious items or enjoyments will be significantly greater, and that feeling is awesome.
Another thing about saving money is that if forces you to pay attention to details. You care more about the intrinsic value of what you buy, what they’re really worth, and most importantly, you appreciate the money you spend a little more, you get more than you usually can out of the money you spend. I used to buy a cup of Starbucks every single day, I even worked there, so Starbucks coffee to me was almost as free as air. But over here in Asia, Starbucks is expensive as fuck, with average Espresso coffee shops charging less than $2 here, Starbucks is for rich people. And I crave that thing once in a while, when I get it, I take my time and enjoy my cup of coffee.
All in all, saving money is important in making more money, because for me, cutting down my expenses can really do wonders, since my expenses tend to exceed my actual income. Not saying that I should become a cheapskate, stingy or anything, just more careful with my spending.
And this may sound cliché but I don’t care, another way to make money is to get yourself involved with sales work or owning your own businesses. The sole reason is that the money you earned through sales or your business is the direct result of your hard work; it is EQUIVELENT to how hard you work. A paid salary is NOT, and the greatest difference in these two is that you appreciate MORE of the money you earned through sales or business, speaking for my experiences, my very first commission check was in the amount of $200, which is shit compare to my monthly Tips I got from Starbucks, but then this $200 was so important to me that I insist on not spending it at all, I look at the beers I buy, which is around $5 a pop here, I’m like Damn! 40 beers and all my hard work (generated through over 3 months of services) is gone! As a result, being involved in sales work will work synergistically with saving money!
The other reason why sales work or owning your business will help you generate more money is that your income is dependent on the effort you put in. If you sit here and type bullshits all day like I do right now, you will not get paid. If you are a sales and you want to get paid, you’re gonna have to get up and do something. And once a sales person realizes this, he/she will think and do all possible ways to increase the possibility of getting paid, you don’t need a nice boss who gives you raises or wait till someone recognize your efforts, as a business owner or sales person, your effort pays itself. It may be a long, challenging, and agonizing process in order to be rewarded, but once you are rewarded, you can expect very EASY income after that. Ever heard of this? “It is 10 times more expensive to sign a new client than to obtain the old ones.”
Keep your old clients satisfied and you’ll get that steady income from them continuously, as long as they’re not bankrupted or taken by other sales, and if they did get taken away, there’s something you did wrong and you have to think about why and then improve yourself for it. But if they’re happy with you, you may spend your extra time looking for the next. And if you are persistent enough, it is safe to say that eventually one may make more commission in 5 years than if he/she was in a salary system.
Fortunately, I am now in both Commission and Salary system, and the day my commission exceeds my salary is coming soon, I don't know how soon but it's in my sight, I look forward to that day and see where it can take me to next.
This is definitely a must see, although from some pre-screening reviews were out and half of them gave thumbs down, but I mean it's Johnny Depp + Christian Bale + Michael Mann, a crime thriller, Cops and Bad guys. "HEAT" anybody? I doubt it's gonna be as good as HEAT was but this shouldn't disappoint.
Well it's been a while since last time I busted out my camera; had the opportunity to use it because colleagues from Taiwan came to visit for a product promotion tour.
Me in work heaven. A place where I spend 6 days a week on, my beloved bead-padded chair and... My notebook, with ultra-classified, secretive bullshits I jot down, it's crazy. Drafts One old, shitty, but working cellphone that I have to get accustomed to. Guy with white shirt on the right, Kenny, he is kinda-sorta my mentor, he is a lot like Ari Gold from Entourage, foul mouthed, quick witted, money loving and ruthless, but he can take care of shit though I'll tell you that. My colleague, she rocked that night. Kenny took us to proclaimed The Most Beautiful Night Sight in K.L. Indeed it was beautiful. Various buildings in the KLCC
The Petronas of course!
Plaza toll, in Malaysia you pretty much hit one of these every 10 miles, too many freeways. The afternoon storm, force of nature, every day, 6pm, sharp.
Alrighty! Let's get back to work, make some calls collect some money then spend them and boost up some GDPs.
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