May 31, 2010

• Thoughts about Parents and Kids

  I've been thinking about marriage and children lately, I mean even though I'm a single, 28 year-old male with no game who lives in the rural, industrial area of Malaysia; meeting, dating, and eventually marrying a woman then have kids is definitely becoming more and more realistic by the minute. I don't know why I have such faith, I just know it will happen soon, probably within this 5 years?

  Anyways, I ain't no model human or a saint, but I have seen my share of irresponsible jerkoffs in my time. And I wonder how these jerkoffs manage to raise children on their own. For example, one of my coworker who just quit today is dead broke; he's come to work for 1 month for the salary, he asked for an advance salary the second week he was in; I lended him some money in private instead, and what does he do with the money? He smokes a pack of cigarette a day, eats outside everyday and even go out and take coffee breaks - all expenses he could cut down to support his daughters. Essentially he borrowed the money for these luxirious things he could enjoy for himself.

  Personally, I am NOT a kid lover, quite frankly I hate kids in general, but I do feel unjust for the kids that are raised under very limited resources. Why do some people get married and have children when they know the money is tight and they probably won't be able to afford the child support? Why do some people insist on having lifestyles like they are free of responsibilities of their children when in fact they have 3 kids sitting at home being babysitted by their parents?

  I see all these guys in their mid-30s bragging about how much they miss the times being 20-something, that their lives are ruined because everything they do now is for the kids, how they have no future, blah blah blah - as if it was their own children's fault that got their shit ruined. What did the kids do? You made them, and you should give up your freedom and time to the lives you brought into this world. And everytime the question of why having children in the first place is raised, they all give you the same answers: "Family pressure" "I'm the only son" "I am getting old"... I find it extremely puzzling that these guys feel obligated to have children because "everyone else is doing it", or the family is giving them the pressure.

  To me, this is a very dangerous cycle. Irresponsible parents give brith to their chilren, but they don't want to give up their fancy lifestyles, hey, gotta party right? gotta go to the movies right? gotta make some more money right? So they leave their kids to their parents. And if things go well, the kids are eventaully taken back and raised by themselves, happy ending; but if things don't go out as planned, chances are another under-loved, under-parented, under-educated human being is raised, and without precautions, chances are they will give birth to some more children that they can't afford to raise, and chances are they leave the kids to their equally incompetent parents, and the cycle goes on.

  I am not saying that all parents should be super rich before they ever think about having children, I am just puzzled by particularly lazy, ignorant, and irresponsible people who never thought twice about the meaning of having children. I see some only-sons who are utterly incompetent, lazy, selfish...spoiled...and...just trashy in general, and it bothers me how his parents fail to see that they've raised a failure? Worst yet, his parents are giving him pressure to marry and have kids so they can have grandchildren and the family name carries on, but it's truly tragic to know that the family name is only more likely to be trashed by irresponsible parenting, and while the newborn kids stay oblivious to the fact that they are raised by a bunch of fuck-ups, they continue to degenerate the bloodline by producing more babies that they can not afford or incapable to raise.

  Come to think about it, the reason why I hate kids must be because they have shitty parents. Shitty parents can't raise kids, so the kids don't have any manners. When kids don't have manners they are no longer cute, just pure annoyances running, giggling, and dancing around messing things up. During my tuotring job when I was in college, I was teaching this 7-year old girl Chinese. One day during the session, her 4 year-old brother was shouting and yelling like an annoying kid usually would, she actually went up and schooled her kid brother to be quiet and polite while Mr. Jacky is in the house - and that was one of the most beautiful things I've ever witnessed - THAT is what I would want my children to be like.

  Anyways, what's my point? My point is that nobody is ever ready for children, but we must be at least as prepared as we possibly can before we can think about bringing lives into this world. If you honestly doubt your preparation and devotion to having children, then DON'T HAVE NO KIDS. And if you accidentally knocked up your girl and decided against abortion, SUCK IT UP AND PAY YOUR DUES, YOUR LIFE IS OVER, THERE IS NO "I" ANYMORE, IT'S "WE" FROM NOW ON, SHUT THE FUCK UP, GET OVER IT AND GET TO WORK!

  Till next time.

  • 2:49 am
  • 2 Comments